


More Hearts Than Mine

by kind-as-sunshine (yours_eternally)



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blow Jobs, Crying, Frottage, Grief/Mourning, Hand Jobs, Kissing, M/M, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, praying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:40:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21598552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yours_eternally/pseuds/kind-as-sunshine
Summary: Back at the Monastery, Sylvain is still reeling from his brother's death and Felix has never been good at offering comfort. Luckily for both of them Sylvain is better at asking for what he needs.Set shortly after Chapter 5.
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Kudos: 52





	More Hearts Than Mine

Felix slapped his palm against the door in place of a knock and stomped into Sylvain’s room. For a moment he was confused — thinking the room was empty — before spotting Sylvain knelt by the bed. Felix stilled. His pulse stuttering like he’d walked in on something obscene. He tried to shrug off the awkwardness of his reaction, hand coming to rest on his hip. 

‘You're _praying_?’ Felix said, trying not to sound astonished. He had never seen Sylvain pray — outside of the Monastery’s compulsory services, and often not even then. He’d always just assumed his friend felt that same vague contempt for religion he did.

Sylvain twisted around to grimace at Felix, interlocked fingers wiggling obviously embarrassed to be caught in the act. He looked tired, eyes dark in his white face. His usual sunniness drained. Then he smiled and Felix felt relieved by the familiar expression.

‘Uh… yeah…’ he admitted and Felix nodded thoughtfully. He wanted to tell him it was okay, that he didn’t care, that he should have knocked.

‘Can I join you?’ Felix asked, lifting his chin. Sylvain raised his eyebrows but nodded and Felix moved to kneel beside him, forcing himself not to stumble. Digging his elbows in the mattress, Felix closed his eyes resisting the urge to stare at his friend.

Silence descended.

Felix felt self-conscious of his breathing. It felt absurdly loud in the room’s expectant quiet, then his stomach began to protest the delay to his dinner. Felix was just about to leap up and leave when Sylvain spoke.

‘I’m praying for my piece-of-trash brother,’ he sighed, ‘— how dumb is that?’ Felix bit his lip, guiltily. An aching stab of pity twisted in his chest. At least he was allowed to say he felt proud of his brother, however much their beliefs differed.

‘I don’t think it’s dumb,’ he mumbled, eyes firmly closed although he felt like Sylvain might be looking at him.

‘He was a murderer and a thief and… a heretic— how… how can I feel _this_ bad about someone like that?’ Sylvain made a choked noise and Felix flicked his eyes open to see he’d sank his head into arms on the bed. Felix sucked his lip, glancing around the room as panic churned in his stomach.

He could see Sylvain’s shoulders were shaking, so he rested his chin on one to keep it still. Felix shuffled on his knees until he could hug him hard around the middle, as though this might keep the feelings in. He could feel his friend’s chest stuttering with the sobs and tried to rub him soothingly.

He didn’t speak. He wasn’t sure he could. He wanted to ask Sylvain what he should do but that didn’t seem fair.

Felix lent on Sylvain’s shoulder, waiting for his hiccuping breaths to subside. Sylvain felt warm, his hand sweating where it was clenched over Felix’s like an anchor. For a while they sat close, Felix’s cheek pressed against Sylvain’s back waiting for the storm’s lull. Sylvain’s grip on Felix softened at last and he sat back, relieved.

‘Hey,’ Sylvain murmured, half turning one hand coming up to wipe at his face.

‘Hey,’ Felix said back. He clumsily smoothed down Sylvain’s shirt collar and tucked his hair behind his ears. Felix was no good at taking care of somebody. But Sylvain was smiling now, eyes low and pensive.

He seemed calmer, though his face was still flushed and his hair stood on end. His shirt was open more than Felix had realised. The freckled skin flowing from his throat to his chest was distracting. Felix looked away — he should leave. He could already feel his cheeks getting warm, mouth tingling.

‘Come here,’ Sylvain said.

‘Why?’ Felix grunted, eyes flicking over the other’s face.

‘Come on,’ he grinned at him eyes dancing, ‘—distract me for a bit.’ Felix looked away from his gleaming eyes quickly, sitting back on his heels.

‘I came to get you for dinner,’ Felix told his knees.

‘I don’t want dinner,’ Sylvain murmured, voice going warm and smooth. A voice Felix had heard him use on girls in the town a hundred times but still made him fight not to bite his lip. He could feel Sylvain’s hand hesitating above his shoulder before clasping it.

‘You want to, huh?’ he asked, knuckles nudging gently under Felix’s chin.

‘I guess…’ Felix mumbled.

‘You’re a real ego boost Fe, you know that?’ he laughed as he pushed himself to standing and reached out a hand to Felix.

‘Aren’t we going to…?’ Felix asked, eyes on the hand. Sylvain snorted softly, ‘you want to do it on the floor?’ Felix felt his face burn at the phase _‘do it’_.

‘No,’ he said quickly, brushing Sylvain’s hand aside as he stood making him snort again amused.

‘Then get in bed,’ Sylvain smirked. Felix felt him give a light push in the small of his back. Without looking at him, Sylvain trotted to the door Felix had left ajar. He slipped through it and Felix knew he was checking if the corridor was clear. Felix sat, toes digging into the bedside rug having removed his shoes. He glanced up when heard Sylvain talking outside the room.

‘Where’s Felix got to?’ he could hear Dimitri question. And Felix remembered with prickle of a guilt that he’d agreed to cram for the Certification Exam with Dimitri.

‘I think he went down for dinner,’ Sylvain said, ‘I told him not to wait.’

‘Ah, okay,’ Dimitri sounded mollified, ‘—are you coming?’

‘No, headache,’ Sylvain sighed, ‘going to try and sleep it off.’

‘Good evening then,’ Dimitri said and Felix could hear the clip of his boots on the flagstones.

Sylvain appeared closing the door softly and bolting at his back. Felix watched him as he inclined his head listening for more footsteps.

‘Alone at last…’ he grinned, winking at Felix after a few more seconds listening. Sylvain strolled to sit beside him, one hand on the mattress behind Felix. Then Sylvain was leaning into him, nose brushing under his ear, warm breath on his neck. Another hand had found its way onto Felix’s leg.

‘You want to lie down, baby?’ he murmured, kissing his cheek. Felix let out an exhale, irritated. It wasn’t like he hated Sylvain talking to him like he was one of his girlfriends, but he did kind of hate that he didn’t.

‘I’m not your date,’ Felix grumbled as he allowed himself to be nudged back until he was horizontal.

‘Could’ve fooled me,’ Sylvain chuckled, as he lifted himself to sit astride Felix plucking at the buttons of his waistcoat.

‘Take yours off first,’ Felix said, hollowing his stomach away for his hands. Sylvain chuckled, sitting up to make a show of shrugging his shirt off. Felix ran his palms appreciatively over the other’s skin. He always liked this part.

‘Gonna let me have a look at you?’ he murmured, catching one of Felix’s palms and kissing it.

‘Okay,’ he muttered, letting Sylvain go back to his buttons.

‘Mmm… pretty good,’ Sylvain murmured, stroking his longest finger up Felix’s bare chest and throat, allowing it to flick off the point of his chin. Sylvain’s hand then moved back to his chest, lightly tracing a dark nipple making it pucker. Felix arched into the touch, eyes briefly closing.

‘You like that?’ Sylvain grinned, stroking again. Felix felt the flush creep down from his face to his chest. His whole body felt taught, hands fisting in Sylvain’s sheets. ‘Come on, Fe— talk. You like me doing that right?’ He stroked again, eyes on Felix’s.

‘Can’t you tell?’ Felix grunted, feeling another wave of glowing pleasure moving down his body.

‘Well, yeah…’ Sylvain laughed, pressing his hips down, ‘but it’s more fun if you say it.’ Felix rolled his eyes and Sylvain grinned continuing to caress him. Sylvain sucked his lip, looking him over thoughtfully. Then he sat back on his heels crawling off Felix. Felix sat up on his elbows to watch as Sylvain’s hands came to the fastening on his breeches. One hot palm cupped him making Felix exhale through his teeth.

‘What are you going to do?’ he asked as Sylvain pulled his laces loose.

‘What do you want me to do?’ he asked with a grin. Felix could see his teeth, pearly white, digging into the deep pink of his lower lip.

‘Your mouth…’ Felix started, cheeks burning. Sylvain’s eyelashes flickered, evidently pleased that Felix was willing to play.

‘Where do you want it, baby?’ he coaxed, warm hands stroking on Felix’s thighs. Toes curling and face still on fire, Felix forced his fist to open then moved his hand to indicate where exactly Sylvain could put his mouth. With a smirk, Sylvain slid his hands under Felix’s waistband and pulling. Felix lifted hips, trying not to actually pant as Sylvain stripped him.

Sylvain kissed the side of his knee, making Felix squirm. Sylvain chuckled, licking a wet stripe down his inner thigh. He tensed as Sylvain blew on his skin. Uncurling his hand, he tentatively stroked Sylvain’s hair as he continued kissing the sensitive skin on his thighs.

‘Getting impatient?’ he chuckled.

‘Sorry,’ Felix mumbled, taking the hand away. Sylvain snorted, catching the hand and putting it back. He moved and, before Felix realised what he was doing, Sylvain had taken his cock into his mouth. Felix bit his lip as pleasure rippled outwards from where Sylvain’s mouth was touching him. Sylvain’s tongue flicked over the tip making Felix whine in spite of himself. This only seemed to encourage him to suck and lick, jaw flexing, until Felix could barely breathe.

Felix’s still had a hand in his hair, he liked the feeling of it. He liked feeling the flex of the small muscles in Sylvain’s neck as he moved his head. Felix could hear ringing his ears his blood pressure spiked, back arching. Feeling the edge of his climax Felix closed his hand convulsively. Feeling the pull on his hair, Sylvain sat back, lips wet and pouty.

‘Okay?’ he mumbled, frowning at Felix.

‘I didn’t want to…’ Felix felt himself blush at Sylvain’s smirk.

‘You can if you want— I don’t mind,’ he grinned but Felix shook his head. He felt overstimulated and wanted Sylvain to kiss him.

‘Can we kiss?’ he asked, the barely receded flush back in full bloom. Sylvain smiled at him again, softer this time. He clambered up the bed to lay next to him as Felix rolled onto his side. He watched Sylvain loosen his breeches and take out his cock. It was pink as his mouth and looked heavy. Felix reached for him and was gratified when Sylvain allowed him to touch. Sylvain rubbed his wrist encouraging him to stroke up and down the length. Felix could feel his chest flushing as he watched Sylvain’s eyes fluttered closed, hips pushing back hungrily into his hand.

When his eyes opened again his pupils were blown wide. He was flushed as well now, lips parted. Felix leaned in to kiss him. Sylvain turned his head, correcting Felix’s awkward angle, and letting him lick into his mouth. Felix moaned. Sylvain’s mouth was warm and yielding. Sylvain cupped his head, teeth gently catching Felix’s lip.

As they kissed, Sylvain slid his other hand down between their bodies. Wriggling his hips into position and guiding Felix into place, he fitted a hand around both of them. Their legs were intertwined and Felix bit his lip again, eyes closing. Sylvain’s hand and cock felt so hot, pressing against him on all sides. His skin was still slick from Sylvain’s mouth and slid easily as he stroked. He could feel his body tense, pleasure sparking down his spine as his hips rolled irresistibly into the other.

‘You close, babe?’ Sylvain murmured against his ear. Felix nodded jerkily. ‘Me too—’ he panted, kissing the side of his mouth, ‘so don’t hold back.’ Felix felt his climax peak and roll through him. He came gasping into Sylvain’s shoulder.

The grip Sylvain had on his hair tightened and his hips pushed into Felix hard once. Felix could feel warm wet on his thighs and stomach.

Sylvain rolled onto his back away from him with a long breath. Felix could feel him stroking his hair, thumb rubbing over his forehead. He closed his eyes, allowing himself to enjoy his friend’s touch.

‘Okay,’ Sylvain yawned, stretching, ‘let’s get cleaned up.’

Felix didn’t move, lethargic in the aftermath. As he watched Sylvain retrieved a cloth and a shallow bowl from his cupboard and filed it with water from the pitcher. He walked back to Felix, tracing a spell on the bottom of the bowl to warm the water.

‘You want to help at all?’ he asked, obviously amused glancing at Felix as he wiped at his stomach. Felix forced himself to sit up. Sylvain washed and dressed with an efficiency that left Felix blinking at him.

‘Do you do this a lot?’ he asked, cleaning himself as he watched Sylvain attempt to flatten his hair in the mirror. As soon as the words were out of his mouth his wished he could take them back. He could remember why he didn’t usually ask. Mostly because it gave him a tight, burning feeling in his chest like he had now. But Sylvain laughed.

‘You know it, babe,’ he snorted. When Felix didn’t laugh Sylvain turned to eye him. Felix ignored the look, shrugging his shirt on and bending to refasten the buttons.

‘You know it’s different with you, don’t you?’ Sylvain murmured, watching him the mirror while still fiddling with his hair.

‘I don’t want your lines,’ Felix grumbled, grabbing his waistcoat but not putting it on. He glanced in the mirror over Sylvain’s shoulder and realised a big chunk of his hair had escaped his bun.  
‘It’s not a _line_!’ Sylvain told him indignantly, turning to pout at him, ‘you’ve always been _my_ favourite, even though I know you prefer Dimitri.’

‘Liar,’ Felix smirked, elbowing him out of the way to fix his hair in the mirror.

‘Call me a liar again,’ Sylvain challenged, catching him in arm lock. Felix twisted, trying to stamp on his arch forgetting he was barefoot. But Sylvain evaded him despite the fact his was laughing so hard Felix could feel him shaking. Felix laughed too. It was ridiculous. They were far too old for play fights.

‘Yield,’ Sylvain grunted, finally ending their scuffle by hugging Felix so tightly against his chest he couldn’t wriggle loose. ‘Come on, Fe, yield,’ he chuckled as Felix squirmed, ‘don’t make me break your arm again.’

‘Don’t pretend you meant to do that— you were eight!’ Felix said, so indignant at the inaccuracy that he forgot they were fighting. Sylvain grinned, shrugging like he didn’t remember, as he turned to fix the bed. Felix watched him as he pulled on his shoes. There was still something a little off, a heaviness.

‘You… alright now?’ Felix said awkwardly to Sylvain’s back.

‘Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,’ he said lightly without looking at him, ‘don’t worry.’

Felix didn’t ask anything else. He wanted to say something comforting. But all he could think of were the things people had said to him after Glenn’s death. Even the least saccharine still made him want to scream.

‘Hey, don’t make that face. I’m fine really,’ Sylvain chuckled, tapping the frown between his eyebrows, ‘let’s go eat.’

Felix swiped at him but Sylvain ducked, opening the door and disappearing. Felix bolted after him. When he caught up Sylvain slung an arm around his shoulders, Felix glared but didn’t shrug him off.


End file.
